From Michele: So today, I’d like to let Taylor from @brown.eyed.flower.child tell her story. If you haven’t check out her Instagram or her travel blog, she is one courageous woman as she has been through bullying and feelings of not belonging. She has followed an un-traditional path and hasn’t let anything get in her way.
And seriously, if you get to know this girl, she’s as real as it gets.
So read her story and wish her well on her page!
Chapter One: Elementary School
Growing up I was always a lost soul. I had a handful of friends (depending on the year) and tried many different sports and extra curricular activities, but I was never good at anything. I was shy, insecure and felt like I was never good enough. I remember kids being mean and laughing at me for missing a goal during a sideline soccer game in gym class or getting pulled out of class to go to “speech” (oh, how humiliating that is for a young kid). Since I was so shy, I also remember how kids used to come up to me and ask me questions as if there was something mentally wrong with me. It was horrible!
Chapter Two: Middle School
I will always remember the transition from elementary school to middle school and how being a “shy kid” was something you could no longer get away with. Not only was I shy, but I was also a late bloomer. Kids were the absolute worst! I remember being bullied at recess, getting stuff thrown at me in class and people IMing me horrible stuff on AOL Instant Messenger. I remember going to school in utter fear of what the next mean person would say to me to make me feel even crappier about myself. Not only was being bullied by almost every single person in your grade tough, but so was going through puberty at the same time. I remember going into depression for the first time ever when I was 12 years old.
Chapter Three: High School
Not only was my middle school years bad, high school was even worse! It wasn’t only because people were still being cruel; I started to feel very lonely for the first time in my life. I remember walking into that high school feeling so small. No one ever noticed me, I barely had friends because everyone formed their group in middle school and I would get cold stares from both guys and girls. I remember my so-called “friends” at the time looking for any random reason to make me feel like a bad person so that they had an accuse to not be friends with me. My junior year of high school was a time where I only had one friend! I remember experiencing depression for the second time in my life at the age of 16.
Chapter Four: College
After four brutal years of high school, I finally was out of my hellhole of a school system and made it to college where my whole world changed! I met so many amazing people; I formed lifelong frienships; my creativity blossomed; I not only got smarter, but also wiser and I had the time of my life. Those four years definitely made up for the past!
Chapter Five: Post College
I ended up graduating college with a decent GPA and the “dream” public relations job in New York City! After a month of working in this position, I got a new supervisor who knew right away how to make my life a living nightmare. I thought my days of being bullied were completed on my high school graduation day, but it definitely crept back into my life at age 22. I was being forced to work early mornings, late nights, weekends and even holidays on a low salary with no overtime. She would even belittle and humiliate me in front of my coworkers! My anxiety was at an all time high and I became mentally exhausted from the whole situation. Thankfully, I had the strength to quit my first full time job (without another job lined up) and eventually find another role that was awesome!
Chapter Six: The Quarter Life Crisis
The Quarter Life Crisis is real my friends and it hit me at the ripe ole age of 24. I remember 24 was the year where everyone around me moved out of their parents’ house, relocated to different cities, were promoted to higher level positions and started to get into serious relationships. I remember feeling stuck in life as if I wasn’t going anywhere. I was bored at my job, had no friends since they were all in newer relationships and had nothing exciting to look forward to.
I was getting a bit desperate and tried online dating (which was a major fail for me) and worked my way to another job that ended up paying me $20K more than what I was making. Okay, the whole big job change made me feel like I was kind of getting somewhere until I actually started it and realized it was way different than what I actually applied to. Once again, bullying came back into my life at 25 and my manager would begin to humiliate and scream at me for not understanding something I wasn’t properly trained on. I, yet again, quit my job without a plan and started to really consider what made me truly happy.
Chapter Seven: The Savior
Travel
I remember taking a step back in spring/summer 2017 to refocus. I remember thinking to myself that if I wanted to live a happy life and eventually become successful, I needed to get money out of my head and ignore what others expected of me. It was my life, not theirs, and I needed to make the most of it, doing what I loved!
Since I started to guest blog for my cousin’s travel agency to make some money while I was figuring everything out, I was finding out more and more that travel writing was something I truly enjoyed doing on a daily basis. The only thing I had to figure out was how I was going to make a career out of it. Eventually, I created my own blog and website, started taking online courses on the business of blogging, attended networking events in the travel industry and began exploring more!
In March 2018, I began to take my travel blog as a business and haven’t looked back since. Ever since I started focusing on what makes me truly happy, I haven’t been happier and more fulfilled. What I have learned through all of this is that sometimes you need to get lost in order to find yourself. You also may need to take a step (or even a few) back to reconnect and focus on what you are truly meant to be doing in life. It is important to always be true to yourself and not let what others say get the best of you. Everyone you talk to has their own dreams in life and it isn’t up to them to impose those same goals on you. If you are feeling lost, do what makes you happy and always practice self-love!
Love,
Taylor